Make it safe to tell the truth: Many children will lie to escape a consequence or punishment.“I noticed there are 5 cupcakes missing” may be more effective than “Did you eat those cupcakes?!” Or, “I see you cut your hair,” may be more effective than asking, “What did you do!?” Or, “What are your plans for getting your English paper turned in?” may be more effective than, “Why didn’t you turn in your essay?!” Phrase your questions carefully: Set your child up for a positive response by making observations and asking open-ended questions.Not only will you appear less threatening, you will be able to think a little more clearly in the moment. Instead, work on getting yourself calm first. However, this response hinders honesty because your kids may do whatever they can to avoid being yelled at (or interrogated) in the future. Your response matters: It’s natural to overreact when you catch your child in a lie (or you suspect they are lying).So, before you assume the worst and take away every toy or video game they own, keep these tips in mind. Jumping straight to punishment may actually increase the number of lies you hear from your child! (And that’s absolutely not your goal.) Rather than searching for the “best” consequence to enforce when your kids lie, take a deep breath. What to do when you catch your child lying. The story doesn’t add up and you’re getting a sense that your daughter isn’t telling you the whole truth.īefore you lose your cool – and miss an opportunity to get the rest of the story – read these tips. How did it get in the toybox? Did you get it from school?”

You know you’ve caught her in a lie, “This isn’t our toy.

Shifting her weight from one foot to the other and avoiding eye contact.

It wasn’t one that you purchased and it wasn’t a gift.Ĭalling your child into the room, you ask, “Where did this come from?” On your typical morning rounds of “clean-up-the-toy-tornado” you notice a new toy mixed in with the others. But, there’s usually more to the behavior than just the lies, use these tips to promote a life-long attitude of honesty in your home. Tired of your child lying, your kids stretching the truth, or hearing them make up stories you know aren’t even close to accurate? It’s natural to want a tried-and-true consequence that will end lying forever.

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